Le$$ons from the Great Cheaters
Got a cheating story? Send it in!
RNC considers selling TV rights of presidential primary debates
The Cheater Says: Finally! Enough pretending. Let’s just directly sell the political process to the corporate media… then we can make some real money. (Also, great timing, doing this while everyone’s distracted with Japan.)
The Cheater Says: So true. With a strong enough economy, Japan can just buy replacement threads for the lost tapestries of life. Ahhhhh, Money. The root of all good.
Tonight and every Thursday at 8pm, The Rude Pundit & I infiltrate the Progressive Radio Network James O’Keefe style to broadcast the Cheater and The Rude show.
The Cheater Says: We have no idea what this show is or will become, but you should join us and provide feedback. Here’s a Facebook page where you can offer suggestions for us to ignore.
Wear this on St. Patrick’s Day:
The Cheater Says: I promise you’ll sneak your way into many a drunken hearts and land many a sloppy kiss. For cheating continuity, best worn when married.
Indiana Secretary Of State Indicted On Voter Fraud and
Corporate Tax Revenues Nearing Historic Lows
The Cheater Says: So, basically, you cheat your way into power so you can cheat yourself rich… and then you blame teachers. (Teachers is just an anagram for Cheater after all).
Work$ for me.
The Cheater Says: Hey, Wisconsin, enough with the solidarity.
What’s Solidarity ever accomplished, except for a short stretch everyone hated my Polish jokes?
Forget togetherness: You wanna make it big? Go it alone. History’s heroes always left their group behind: Sting… Beyonce… Judas.
Face it, in America, it’s every man, woman-who’s-attractive-to-man, and child-who-can-afford-to-buy-healthcare-from-the-man for him/her/itself.
Only once you’ve gotten filthy rich can you get together – with your wealthy friends – to achieve great things: Tax breaks, no-bid contracts, and union-busting.
$olidarity.
“Biggest Fish Face Little Risk of Being Caught”
The Cheater Says: There are two le$$ons in this.
1. Go big, or go home. Small crime – like petty theft to feed a family – gets punished. Big crime – like scamming the country into ruin – doesn’t.
2. You might get caught cheating… but that doesn’t mean you’ll get punished cheating. In fact, getting caught cheating is just an opportunity to cheat even more. In China, the word “problem” is the same as the word “opportunity.”
We should listen to China: They have all our money.
Government Gave Programmer $20 Million for Non-Existent Work
The Cheater Says: Guy claimed he had software that could stop Al Qaeda. Government bought it. Guy spent money. Simple.
